Family Rules:

I found it very interesting to indentify a few unspoken family rules in my house. Here are a few I came up with:
1. We all sit in certain spots for dinner
2. When we are sitting in the living room Dad has a lazy boy he always sits in and if one of us is sitting in it and he comes in we move. He doesn't even have to ask us we just know thats were he relaxes.
3. Dad drives the car
4. mom does the laundry
5. When I call home just to talk I call my mom.
6. When I call to ask a religious question I call my dad.
7. When Ann ( my sister) and her family come to visit my mom buys rolls for hogie sandwhiches.
8. Logan ( only boy in the family) always helps Dadwith the outside work.

These were just a few "family rules" I identified but there are many more. It is really interesting to me that we establish these rules in our homes without ever really stating them or writing them down. Everyone just kinda knows. I wonder what rules I will carry over into my house with my future family and how you make it so that everyone just knows. I wonder if my parents wanted to instigate these rules or if they just kinda happend?

I just read about the exchange theory form the text and it really made me think. In the exchange theory we look at our relationship and ask ourselves are the costs worth more than the rewards. I feel that although this is neccessary in dating and chosing a spouse it isn't the attitude to have in marriage. We shouldn't be so focused on our needs being met as we should focus on meeting their needs. Marriage teaches us how to become selfless and put others needs before our own. If we are constantly asking ourselves if all the work we are putting in is worth it then we are being selfish and need to change our thought process.

In class this week the question was asked " How isolated should a couple become after marriage?" This is a question I have thought a lot about. I am a very social person and definitely believe in the more the merrier theory. I just love doing things with friends and getting big groups together. I am kind of scared that when I get married I will lose all my friends and all of a sudden it will just be me and him. I know that it’s important to go off and establish your own little family after marriage but where is the line between that and becoming antisocial? It’s almost like people think once you’re married that you don’t need friends anymore but I don’t think that’s true for me. I don’t know though I guess because I’m not married maybe it’s different when you have your best friend/spouse around all the time.

I have just created this Blog for my Family Relations class : ) I'm excited for this semester and expect that we will learn alot and have a great time!